So, I’m considering all my options and have decided to cast all of them aside and just…start… writing.
I’d like to say that this site will follow and catalog all the things I’m going to do to try to get signed as a solo artist. Although, I hope to not make too many mistakes, rest assured, young listeners & readers, I shall, will and…hehe you’ll hear about it here.
But something tells me it will be more, and most of it has yet to reveal itself, certainly not to me.
So, why solo?
I think the only answer to that is, why not? I have been in a band called Portable for many many years. As recent as just 6-7 months ago, we self-released an EP, but as time went on it became clear that, in the interests of preserving friendships, we all needed outside activities.
But as you can see, I refuse to speak in past tense regarding my band. For the only way you can truly break up a band so connected to each other, so interweaved in each other’s lives, is if hatred was involved. And it’s not. One can say this is just playing semantics, but I believe in this completely: if we hated each other, then it’s done. through. kaput. But, there’s not, so… it isn’t. I love my brothers and support anything they do just like I believe they support me in what I’m doing now. (By the way, Gus is busy checking out other projects to involve himself in, Brian is playing on a few things, doing some session work as well, and Seb has a fabulous thing going as a keyboard/dj/techno/sequencing thing. It is a marvel to behold.
So, as far as I go…
As long as I can remember, I have been compelled to write music. It’s more than just an itch, see. It’s much more magnetic, forceful than that. So, I thought the best use of my time now as I go forward was to write without pre-described boundaries. Let the songs dictate to me, rather than me dicate to the song. This process takes me places that well, sometimes suck. BUT…it can pretty fulfilling too.
Take for example the song, ambulance chaser. I wrote the basic riff on acoustic oh, over a year ago. I was living on one of my best friend’s couch [I’ve since graduated to a warm bed of my own]. I played it for the boys in Portable, and we had a couple of nice go arounds. But fuck if I couldn’t write words for it. All I had was, “it’s like monday, tuesday”. Didn’t really go anywhere else.
Then late last year, I at least wanted to get some extra music ideas [solo section, maybe a bridge?] down on “tape”. I was recording with only a click track, a microphone and the doors to the balcony of my apartment open because it was FUCKING HOT!!!
I laid down a few tracks of acoustic, still no words. But while the 2nd guitar track was being recorded, an ambulance or fire truck went blazing by. And of course, the microphone took it all in.
I could have erased it, citing anal retentiveness. But that’s not me. I’m also not foolish enough [or maybe smart enough] to believe it was some sort of sign. I just decided to ride the wave to where it takes me.
I thought of the title Ambulance Chaser. Initially, I figured the song could be about someone that society thinks is just a waste of space, but he still gets up everyday and does the job that puts food on family’s plate. I always have liked pointing out just how grey life really is, and seriously taking issue with people who think it’s black and white.
In the end though, it became a little more ambiguous, and I leave it up to you to form final thought.
But see? I was off and running. One little thing is all it takes.
Well, maybe more than one little thing. I knew that if I was going to do this, I had to become a little more patriotic. And that meant using the most patriotic forms of trading tools. Yes, my friends, the credit card.
I invested pretty heavily on myself [by my own notion anyway] and set up a completely self-contained apartment studio. Oh, and thank god for EBay too.
Since November of last year, I have spent learning the tools and taking a crack at the learning curve. And making many many many test CD’s for the “listen on the way to work.” (Can I tell you how much it sucks when you make a bad burn but don’t notice til you’re already on the freeway!!!??)
The reason I did this was I wanted to give myself the most freedom I could to get the right ideas out. Sometimes I’d toil for hours just figuring out why the hell a chord doesn’t work against a melody, and sometimes it’d take me three seconds to find the fix. Knowing when to walk away and let it sit for a few is one of life’s greatest lessons.
The only way to have this kind of time option is if I did it all myself. Self-contained. And no real social activities outside of The Shield and the Sopranos.
So, I have a job. I pay my bills. I love my friends and my family.
But I have this need to create. I have this fire in me that is fierce. And it makes me strong.
I am exceptionally nervous. I’ve never done this before and frankly have no idea where it’s going to take me.
But I’m about to find out.
